I had an interesting interaction with my Mom yesterday. Every few weeks, she makes copies of various home activities and emails them to the entire family. I don’t think anyone reads them. I guess the idea is so that if she passes away, people are not lost in the process of paying things. People are like, “Well, if we need to, we can open the attachments later.”

I also feel like it’s very important. Things like the phone bill and repair services are understandable, but things like internet seem silly. If she passed away, we would probably cancel most services except electricity and power and try to move out within a few months.

The mail services are always an issue whenever we have to pay. I don’t know, maybe I’m misunderstanding because of my experience when my father passed away three years ago. I thought maybe I should ask her how it was, but maybe it’s the memory. So maybe I should look it up.

I had a dream that we were in a very tall building or apartment with Christine. It felt like a mix between the Grand Hyatt Busan, which is the tallest building, and the Grand Hyatt Taipei because the Taipei 101 was there

Then there there was an earthquake. It feels a little bit like you’re in the building, but also in a train. We were looking out the windows, and suddenly, I noticed one of the buildings we were looking at outside was leaning 90 degrees momentarily. I thought it was an earthquake, so I said, “Oh baby, there’s an earthquake coming! Let’s run to the middle of the building.” So I just grabbed her, and we ran to the middle of the building—the middle of the floor—so that we would feel the shaking less (dream logic).

So we went to the middle, and from there, we saw how the other buildings were starting to shake. We started to feel it. At the same time, we were on a train, watching this building while the train was moving, passing by the window very quickly. That’s 200 or something.

Then we cut off the train and we were in the shopping district downtown. We had to get on the next train; we had to change trains there. had breakfast to meet with Grace. So, this train station has multiple lines. We are getting pretty close because we need the case, 950, 940, with her. We decided to make use of the time and meet with her while we ate breakfast.

The train station was packed. Our students, we had to take the red line. The red line is very busy and transitionally packed, and there are like multiple spots where you could just step into the rails, just like the A line. It was a very basic setup: train left and train going right on the same line, and a train passing that was blue.

We were waiting at the spot. I was like, “Oh, okay, train. You’re waiting.Something was physically uncomfortable. I’m going to go or something, so I separated. Maybe I want to find out where to take the train. I was like, “Oh, here is like that.” I remember at one point I was sitting on the floor, still drinking, my legs too close to the rail. I tried to move it a little bit; it was very close, like nothing.

I’m trying to get back to the transition pack, so I don’t know, we’re going to be late for lunch with Grace.

A bunch of students got on the bus, and then the students left, getting on another bus that came right after. Some people were talking Korean, some people were talking Korean English. So I asked them if this bus goes to downtown, to the harbor. I thought that was down.

From there, I tried calling. I called the bus too. I pulled up the maps on my iPhone and for some reason, it appeared 3D. I was looking up against what I could see in the window, trying to figure out where this bus was going and if it was going towards downtown or not. I remember there was this big cluster, a big building there. There’s another cluster lower. I was trying to figure out that area and this other area next to the lower one. I mean, so far.

I wonder if, looking back at 2020, I was doing fine with it until 2021. Around 2020, I started feeling like, “Oh, it’s not doing much for me; it feels stuck often.” Then I saw news of the Philips CPAP recall. I followed it and started to wonder if this problem was due to the recall, even though the recall had nothing to do with the effectiveness of the machine.

It was related to some users washing the machines with chemicals that were too strong, which caused the degradation of some internal components. That meant that fumes from the degraded material were going through the CPAP. So, they changed their conditions to make sure people didn’t use certain corrosive things to wash it. This had nothing to do with me because I barely wash it, maybe just with water twice a month or something.

I wonder if there’s some paranoia about that and I’m seeing that it’s not working, etc. I’m still waking up. I’m having that crazy, strange thing where I get up somewhere between 3:00 and 5:00 a.m.

Yesterdya ive been having fun with having google gemini To summarize my emails over the past 25 years and summarize different life events or life phases, I’m looking at a couple of things, but there are some gaps. I should do a couple of different things that complement this.

First is my block of WordPress exports—the main block. Second is photos on YouTube. I should remind you to check the YouTube channel. Third is social media. If there is a way to efficiently export just the text part of the social media posts (Facebook, Twitter), that would be helpful. Fourth, maybe an index of the personal items in Dropbox. Dropbox itself is too large, but an index would be great. This would cover family timelines.

So, I think, yeah, that could be interesting.

All right. The past few days when I got to record… Oh, so today is Friday. The past few days when I got… Usually a combination of those… I’ve been trying to process and record the same things. Yeah. Focus on not forgetting these interesting thoughts that could be helpful later for work ideas. I was very focused on not getting to this room to get some new information: emails, money updates. Maybe just by forgetting them and getting them… Sometimes I just write them down for later. That’s what happens months before. I look at the notes. I think maybe I’ll forget. I think I was feeling this is useful. I’m not going to remember the logistics of how to…

Today is the 28th, I think. Yesterday, we dropped off Joy and we had to be my uncle. Interesting. We had a brief chance to talk about the governor’s race. The top five candidates are two Republicans and three Democrats. There’s pressure on the trailing candidates to drop out so the Democrat votes consolidate.

I remember, I think in 2010, the top two primary system was introduced. One analysis of the top two primary system—it must have been used elsewhere too—is that it introduces the possibility that both candidates in the final ticket are of the same party if the votes of the other party are split across multiple candidates. That’s what’s happening now. Right now, the top two are Republicans. Because of that, there is all this pressure for the Democrats to drop out. Usually, the more pressure there is to drop out, the smaller the progressive support for the candidates. So, right now the pressure is… nothing is decided. Okay, I mean, I can’t imagine being too popular.

Yeah, so I guess in this scenario, which is not that advantageous towards the more conservative mainstream, that’s why you need a single transfer system. It allows for a more extended choice in how you vote because then you can vote for the person you want without having to worry that it’s a wasted vote.

Democrats, they would support something like that because that means they are in a much more precarious position in the primaries. Voters who voted just to prevent the Republican from winning would now be voting for the candidate they want.

That made me think, if the mainstream Democrat is afraid of not being supported by a significant portion—or even the majority—of Democrat voters, doesn’t that mean that person is not mainstream? I need to analyze this stuff to see if it makes sense, but that’s something that’s true.

stream. in Korea. . The group. I for some reason we’re doing it. having to campaign like a political campaign but we only have like six weeks. . I think they usually have all the action crew there. . Yeah. . . my monster. the funder of the campaign I think. And . I with their usual approach to things. So we’re like, okay, so we need to. I remember but like to do something and it was going to be like pretty small scale. . I . . 100 people or something. my world was printing. materials that the people don’t know. . See. you know, we decided last minute like six weeks to do this. well we know we open. . I the conversation we had. well. tell me what can be done in six weeks. . The . The . So like the fun they’re being there and being very lost and not having much knowledge of the field feels like so bad. people. people’s retellings. . Um . I We will have this be like well somebody tell me what what is that like otherwise why I put money into this. well. many things can be done. I. time. could print a multiple paper that’s very compressive. I think that’s what we have like multiple items. So maybe those propositions. we can have all these and like that takes weeks to make. We don’t have we can make something short like a one page that I was explaining. Well, one can be take a few days. maybe we didn’t even have six weeks. Maybe we have. six days. six days. So I said yeah, we can make a one page. I want to take. . Yeah. right then printing so crazy I mean just ight. 100 one page problem take half an hour. Um . Thank you. explain that people other people in the team were like, yeah, you know, you just dropping bars or something. dropping bars. but I will still be I don’t know what that like I don’t know what that like I I don’t think I frustrated. . The How will the action . Wow. the dream. . The your thought talking about projects like we need to fix the toilet. It’s like this manager. that same. I have. . I. field experience about the things you have to do like . I. . I dealing with the trash and I’m not quite sure she has a full understanding of the process in which the trash bags are being processed but she wants some outcomes. well, some of these outcomes are out with process. . The we never have that discussion. I. just it’s . . general question. come from. I feel very ck. manager doesn’t know what’s going on things. . The the field reality is different. try to draw specific examples. I remember.

I was thinking about my therapist. I have concerns about the therapy style, and maybe I should ask these questions to Gemini or to someone in a friend group, maybe a therapist. I don’t know.

I need to bring up my concerns about the style. In a previous session, my therapist, especially later on, was very focused on exploring things together and asking follow-up questions. They made me search for why I felt a certain way and what was at the bottom of these healing emotions. After each session, I felt like I found things.

The current therapy style is very shallow. I start explaining an issue for about 10 minutes, and the therapist stops me, interjecting and sharing her own opinion about the topic, correcting me if my thoughts don’t align with hers, or sharing some episode that relates to it. Then, I listen to her, and I think, “Okay, this isn’t therapy; it’s a conversation. Let’s listen.” After the conversation, I guess I lose track of things. It’s like, “Oh, we finished talking about this topic now.” So, I feel like something in that interaction blocks me from exploring the topic. I think there are still things to explore.

Therapy, especially last year, was great; very deep times. Although, after a few sessions, it felt a little repetitive, maybe like it was dialectical. We find X issue, and then we have the minus X. Sometimes therapists help me reach a conclusion, or sometimes they ask the questions for me to arrive at the conclusion. At some point, you’re cycling back to the same threads. Whenever it became cyclical, the therapist would notice it. I lose interest in the conversation. I’m not sure what it is.

Yeah, with the cramps still… There are benefits to having conversations, but there’s too much interruption and too much of her own stories. I talked about that. If that’s not something she can fix, I think I need to find a different therapist. I think the other therapist I had before—the guy in Silver Lake, the first one in 2020 or 2021—was better. That vision circle therapist, at some point, said they were going on vacation for a couple of months, so I had to continue something like that. The second vision circle was in 2024 or late 2025 and was very expensive. I can’t remember; I should look at my history. Maybe I should make a Google section for therapists.

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